PALM BEACH – In an exclusive interview given to a little-known far right news website, former President Donald Trump gave his insight on the nation’s latest big problem. Trump somehow connected the issue pushing the nation ever closer to its breaking point to the use of windmills to generate electricity.
The tall leggy blonde interviewer somehow managed to get Trump’s attention and stop his ranting about the 2020 elections to ask him how he would resolve the issue hanging over us all now that it is here. Trump leaned forward in his chair, made a diamond shape with his hands, and replied, “Well, and I said this a long time ago, we are playing right into their hands. Green energy. The windmills. They don’t work. They kill all the birds. And I’ve been preaching this for years. The windmills.”
Brushing a lock of hair out of her face and smiling at Trump, the reporter nicely asked him to elaborate on how this would get the country out of the bind it’s in. “The environmentalis love the windmills,” Trump continued. “The dodo birds. What about them? They’re the best birds. We don’t want to kill all the dodo birds. Frederick Douglass said to me this morning, ‘Sir, we can’t kill all the dodo birds.’ He’s done an amazing job and is being recognized more and more.”
As the interview dragged on without Trump saying a single thing about the problem itself, he finished by bragging, adding “I never understood wind and I’ve studied it better than anybody. Tremendous fumes, gases are spewing into the atmosphere. When George Washington Carver crossed the river he said, ‘Give me liberty or give me death!’ Those windmills. They kill all the birds. Why don’t they make flour while they make electricity? You know we have a world, right?”